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Who Are They Trying To Kid?

Taylor Momsen's near-fatal sore throat was the result of the flu and working too hard according to Momsen's Gossip Girl co-star Kelly Rutherford. "You know, all it takes is to get a flu, and then you work a lot of hours, and you have [a serious] flu," explained Dr. Rutherford. So that's going to be the company line then...Taylor works too hard and she's prone to the flu. Not "she's a 14-year-old anorexic cokehead," which we know is the truth. Whatever they say. Forget The Not-Gay Rumors

Not-gay rumors have been swirling around Lance Bass. Pictures like this will make those go away fast. (The chick is his dance partner on Dancing With the Losers Who Can't Get Work Anywhere Else Except Maybe a Rehab Show on VH1 or Perhaps a Holiday Inn Somewhere in Central Missouri.) Bye Bye

Raffaello Follieri has been sentenced to 54 months in prison for being a scumbag con artist piece of shit. In court, the slimebag's lawyer claimed Raffaello became "intoxicated" by his and Anne Hathaway's jet-setting lifestyle and perpetrated his various scams so he could keep the good times rolling. Wow - so basically he blamed her. If she hadn't been such a high-class piece of tail they would've been happy eating burgers and going to movies. But she made him steal so they could fly around the world hob-nobbing with the rich and beautiful. What a fucking sleaze. Look Out Miley

Selena Gomez is being altogether too complimentary of Miley Cyrus and her underwear-modeling boyfriend Justin Gaston. "I honestly think that she's adorable," said Selena at a recent event. "I think she's really sweet, and I think that he's really cute, too. I wish them all the luck." Translation: "I want to sit on Justin's dick and make him shoot his jizz in me like Old Faithful. Why is that hot steaming hunk of man fucking that snaggletoothed little bitch when he can have me, a little piece of Chiquita jailbait who makes all the older men moan with desire? Hmm?" Congrats

David Gest finally found himself another love to replace Liza Minnelli. Way to go Dave! I knew you'd get yourself back on that horse again buddy. Mommy Scene

I have no idea which kid of Britney's that is. I lost track several months ago and frankly I don't care anymore. Whatever Britney's on now is working really well. The kid too. How It Went Down

Sarah Palin shows her daughter how she got the big important running-mate job.